Living not existing

I am doing it.  I have survived two hours alone with just the kids and I.  This is huge.  I feel like I have climbed Mt Everest.  This is one of the things I was terrified of not just doing but coping.  And I am.  Plus I am also weaning off some of my meds so I am also doing it without the pharmaceutical crutch I was relying on in hospital.

(seven hours later)
Now that I have climbed Mt Everest, I have to figure out how to pack up, and climb down and go home.  I need to figure out out to stay home.  How to stay on track, keep on keeping on, staying the distance and so on.

I take a lot of strength from music and today I am sharing Pink and a song that is very important to me and I hope you will enjoy.

This song is for my friend Kim.  A friend who is an amazing girl.  She has an awesome sense of fun.  She is a cool chick.  She has great values and ethics but I must say she has crap taste in chicks.  Come on now Kim surely you must agree that Susan Sarandon is one sexy chick.  I know you bat for the same team but Ms Sarandon would definitely make me reconsider changing teams.  Kim, stay strong babe.  You have fought this far - you can fight some more.



Fuckin' Perfect Lyrics

Made a wrong turn
Once or twice
Dug my way out
Blood and fire
Bad decisions
That's alright
Welcome to my silly life

Mistreated 
Misplaced 
Misunderstood
Miss knowing it's all good
It didnt slow me down.

Mistaking
Always second guessing
Underestimating
Look I'm still around

Pretty, pretty please
Dont you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than
Fucking perfect

Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like you're nothing
You're fucking perfect to me

You're so mean
When you talk
About yourself, you were wrong
Change the voices in your head

Make them like you instead
So complicated
Look how we all make it
Filled with so much hatred
Such a tired game

It's enough
I've done all I can think of
Chased down all my demons
I've seen you do the same

Oh

Pretty, pretty please
Dont you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than
Fucking perfect

Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like you're nothing
You're fucking perfect to me

The whole worlds scared
So I swallow the fear
The only thing I should be drinking
Is an ice cold beer

So cool in line
And we try, try, try
But we try too hard
And it's a waste of my time

Done looking for the critics
Cause they're everywhere
They don't like my jeans
They don't get my hair

Exchange ourselves
And we do it all the time
Why do we do that?
Why do I do that?

Why do I do that?

Yeeeeaaaahhh
Oooooooh
Oh baby pretty please

Pretty, pretty please
Dont you ever feel
Like you're less than
Fucking perfect

Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like you're nothing
You're fucking perfect to me

You're perfect, you're perfect

Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like you're nothing
You're fucking perfect to me