My doctor, the one in charge of my head, my mental health and really the overall ongoing quality of my life has told me to go home by end of this week. OMG I am terrified. I am freakin not happy about this at all. He says "you know Laura you can't stay here forever.". Well derr I feel like saying. Of course I can't stay here forever, but I was hoping to get one more extra week than he recommends.
Why? Because my first week at home coincides with school holidays. I told him this. I said I do not believe that being at home with my kids is the best thing for me and my continued recovery. He did not get it. He just felt getting someone to be at home will be enough. But, Doctor I am sorry it won't be.
I do want to be at home and had hoped that my discharge date would coincide with Easter. I felt that was a prime time for me to come home. I would be there and have lovely quality time with the kids but my darling husband would also be there to help out and keep Clay calm or at least busy.
I am in a fragile frail state. I know, I have written that I plan on being strong and taking the bull by the horns and such, but this will not be an overnight fix. One thing that is very important is a successful return home. Not just for me, but for my kids. The one thing - aside from health and happiness - I want for them is stability. Having a nuts Mummy is not akin to stability. But having a Mummy who can stay out of hospital permanently is the next best thing.
Your comments and advice on how to handle, broach, deal with this are most welcome my lovely family and friends.
As always, take care, hold your loved ones close.