Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Affirmation Day 11

I am the Mum of two children both with needs. Clay is autistic and my God I could write an epic novel about what that has involved and the sacrifices we have made. Ally does not have a diagnosis but has high anxiety which can sometimes totally impair her.

I borrowed the following from Special Needs Mums Like Me I will add my own text in bold.

Top 20 Reasons Why Moms of Kids With Special Needs ROCK

1) Because we never thought that "doing it all" would mean doing this much. But we do do it all -- and then some.

2) Because we've discovered patience we never knew we had. And this has made us better people.

3) Because we are willing to do something 10 times, 100 times or 1,000 times if that's what it takes for our kids to learn something new.

4) Because we have heard doctors tell us the worst, and we've refused to believe them. Take THAT naysaying doctors of the world!

5) Because we have bad days and breakdowns and bawl-fests, and then we pick ourselves up and keep right on going.

6) Because we gracefully handle the stares, the comments, the rude remarks. (Well, mostly gracefully.) Um I am not sure mine is mostly graceful. More like on the odd occasion I have been graceful.

7) Because we manage to get ourselves together and get out the door looking pretty damn good. Heck, we even make sweatpants look good! Does pyjamas count?

8) Because we are strong. Man, are we strong. Who knew we could be this strong?

9) Because we aren't just moms, wives, cooks, cleaners, chauffeurs and women who work. We are moms, wives, cooks, cleaners, chauffeurs, women who work, physical therapists, speech therapists, occupational therapists, teachers, researchers, nurses, coaches and cheerleaders. Whew!

10) Because we work overtime every single day.

11) Because we also worry overtime, but we work it through. Or we eat chocolate or Pirate's Booty or gourmet cheese or drink too much (which aren't reimbursable by insurance as mental-health necessities, but should be).

12) Because we are more selfless than other moms. Our kids need us more. I am not sure I agree with this one I think all Mum's are selfless

13) Because we give our kids with special needs endless love, and then we still have so much love left for our other kids, our husbands, our families. And our hairstylists, of course.

14) Because we inspire one another in this crazy blogosphere every single day.

15) Because we understand our kids better than anyone else -- even if they can't talk; even if they can't gesture; even if they can't look us in the eye. We know. We just know.

16) Because we never stop pushing for our kids.

17) Because we never stop hoping for them, either.

18) Because just when it seems like things are going OK, they're suddenly not OK, but we deal. Somehow, we always deal -- even when it seems like our heads or hearts might explode.

19) Because when we look at our kids, we just see great kids -- not kids with cerebral palsy/autism/Down syndrome/developmental delays/whatever.

20) Because ... well, you tell me. We fight, fall down, pick our selves up, dust ourselves off and start all over again.

I know I have cheated by borrowing someone else's words but they say it all. A Mum of special needs kids has to deal with a lot. I am not saying this makes us better Mums in fact sometimes I am not a good Mum at all. I am not saying we sacrifice more. I am just saying our lot in life is hard. Sometimes for me, it is so hard that I collapse. I have fallen apart, been to hell and slowly coming back. For all us Mum's special needs or not it is one day at a time. We all feel guilty - it is a Mum's lot. Let's today for one day say to hell with it. I will not feel guilty for working, not working, giving my kids tinned spaghetti for dinner, making them the same lunch everyday for five weeks in a row. Lets say yay we are doing it. We are doing the hardest thing there is today and surviving.

Take care Mum's you are all your kids' biggest fan and champion. We all need our own guardian angel.

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